Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
ABA & Your Family
ABA (applied behavior analysis) is defined as the science in which the analysis of behavior are applied systematically to improve socially significant behavior, and in which experimentation is used to identify the variables responsible for change in behavior. Basically ABA is finding out why your child does something and then tailoring a program on increasing good behavior and decreasing bad behavior. There is no cure for autism, there is only treatments.
Any parents I talk to I stress that ABA works, it works for Neuro-typical kids, it works for special needs kids. It works when I try to use it on my Mom to get her to listen to me, it works!
There are a few things I think are important to know about ABA:
1. Not all ABA companies are created equally-
We moved onto a newer and better company, Avita Nova! The supervisor that I had adored had moved here and now I knew the questions I needed to ask to get the services for my kids that I knew they deserved.
When Liam was first diagnosed with Autism I saw an advertisement on Facebook for a summer camp. We had never been in any therapy whatsoever and I was excited to meet other parents and kids that were going through the same thing we were going through. The company (Trumpet Behavioral Health) started off wonderfully; they had a play group with other kids in Liam's age group. They came to our house. They had camps for summer, spring and winter breaks. The supervisor was very much on top of our therapists but then our supervisor left and everything went downhill. We started losing therapists, we didn't see our new supervisor at all and it just seemed like they cared more about making money than us. I was so sad when we left because they had started to become part of our family. We left behind some amazing people.
2. School ABA is different than home/office ABA-
It took us a very long time to get ABA into Liam's classroom. I fought tooth and nail for over a year to get them to offer it to him. Liam was having accidents in the classroom, he was hitting and biting teachers and other students, he was screaming and crying on a daily basis and he was hiding under desks in an effort to escape the teacher and aides. No matter how much ABA he was provided at home it didn't matter because with ABA it's about immediate response to behaviors. We couldn't immediately respond to the behavior in the classroom because the therapist wasn't in the classroom.
Liam now receives 5 hours of ABA in the classroom every week. The teacher decides when Liam needs the time most. Is he having a hard time with other kids at recess, is he having a hard time sitting still for math, or is at the end of the day when he's tired that he needs time with his ABA therapist?
The district can provide ABA services in the classroom if you or they feel it's necessary. If you feel it is necessary and they do not provide it start keeping records on everything. Talk to your teacher and make them understand how important ABA is to you and your child. Most special needs teachers use ABA in their classrooms already! (token boards?!) Most districts (including San Mateo) have an Autism specialist on staff.
3. ABA works best when it's started early
You know how you have always wanted to learn Italian? You have taken class after class but your accent is still not great? Yet your friend whose parents are linguists knows 6 different languages and speaks them fluently with a perfect accent! It's all about getting to their brains while they are still forming. Our children will always be different but we can give them the tools to succeed, and the faster we give them those tools the more time they will have to put them to good use.
I also want to stress that if you do not start early it doesn't mean that your child will not learn. It just makes it easier if they are young.
4. ABA will not turn your child into a parrot or robot, and in fact your child can have fun!
When our children are learning to read they memorize. When our children are learning to do their times tables they memorize the problems. When children learn they do sound robotic until they are able to make choices on their own. If ABA is implemented correctly they will not sound robotic or like a parrot. They won't repeat back what they are told but will make healthy choices on their own.
Children are not made to sit for hours at a table. They get up, they play pretend, they have sessions during play groups. In fact we have had sessions in the pool before! We have made oatmeal cookies, we have painted pictures and built blanket forts.
If you have any questions of your own please feel free to leave them in the comments section below!
*All opinions are my own. Although Trumpet did not work for us, it doesn't mean they won't work for you.
Any parents I talk to I stress that ABA works, it works for Neuro-typical kids, it works for special needs kids. It works when I try to use it on my Mom to get her to listen to me, it works!
There are a few things I think are important to know about ABA:
1. Not all ABA companies are created equally-
We moved onto a newer and better company, Avita Nova! The supervisor that I had adored had moved here and now I knew the questions I needed to ask to get the services for my kids that I knew they deserved.
- If we needed them could the therapists go on outings with us?
- Can the therapists eat with us when we run food programs so that our kids see them making a good impression?
- Is there a play group with other kids in their age groups?
- How often does the supervisor check in?
- Are the therapists required to provide their own positive reinforcers, supplemented by us, such as games, stickers and toys?
- How often do they change the program?
- Are the therapists allowed to be alone with kids?
- What is the stance of the company on punishment?
- Does my insurance cover the cost?
- Is my co payment per day or per session? As sometimes you can have several sessions in one day.
- Will the company work with the insurance company or is it my responsibility?
- If the therapist doesn't work out can we request a new one?
- What education do the therapists have?
- Is their a background check on therapists?
- Do the therapist believe in pairing? (pairing is when the therapist spends a certain amount of time bonding with the kids, they don't run programs just play getting to know the kids.)
When Liam was first diagnosed with Autism I saw an advertisement on Facebook for a summer camp. We had never been in any therapy whatsoever and I was excited to meet other parents and kids that were going through the same thing we were going through. The company (Trumpet Behavioral Health) started off wonderfully; they had a play group with other kids in Liam's age group. They came to our house. They had camps for summer, spring and winter breaks. The supervisor was very much on top of our therapists but then our supervisor left and everything went downhill. We started losing therapists, we didn't see our new supervisor at all and it just seemed like they cared more about making money than us. I was so sad when we left because they had started to become part of our family. We left behind some amazing people.
2. School ABA is different than home/office ABA-
It took us a very long time to get ABA into Liam's classroom. I fought tooth and nail for over a year to get them to offer it to him. Liam was having accidents in the classroom, he was hitting and biting teachers and other students, he was screaming and crying on a daily basis and he was hiding under desks in an effort to escape the teacher and aides. No matter how much ABA he was provided at home it didn't matter because with ABA it's about immediate response to behaviors. We couldn't immediately respond to the behavior in the classroom because the therapist wasn't in the classroom.
Liam now receives 5 hours of ABA in the classroom every week. The teacher decides when Liam needs the time most. Is he having a hard time with other kids at recess, is he having a hard time sitting still for math, or is at the end of the day when he's tired that he needs time with his ABA therapist?
The district can provide ABA services in the classroom if you or they feel it's necessary. If you feel it is necessary and they do not provide it start keeping records on everything. Talk to your teacher and make them understand how important ABA is to you and your child. Most special needs teachers use ABA in their classrooms already! (token boards?!) Most districts (including San Mateo) have an Autism specialist on staff.
3. ABA works best when it's started early
You know how you have always wanted to learn Italian? You have taken class after class but your accent is still not great? Yet your friend whose parents are linguists knows 6 different languages and speaks them fluently with a perfect accent! It's all about getting to their brains while they are still forming. Our children will always be different but we can give them the tools to succeed, and the faster we give them those tools the more time they will have to put them to good use.
I also want to stress that if you do not start early it doesn't mean that your child will not learn. It just makes it easier if they are young.
4. ABA will not turn your child into a parrot or robot, and in fact your child can have fun!
When our children are learning to read they memorize. When our children are learning to do their times tables they memorize the problems. When children learn they do sound robotic until they are able to make choices on their own. If ABA is implemented correctly they will not sound robotic or like a parrot. They won't repeat back what they are told but will make healthy choices on their own.
Children are not made to sit for hours at a table. They get up, they play pretend, they have sessions during play groups. In fact we have had sessions in the pool before! We have made oatmeal cookies, we have painted pictures and built blanket forts.
If you have any questions of your own please feel free to leave them in the comments section below!
*All opinions are my own. Although Trumpet did not work for us, it doesn't mean they won't work for you.
Tuesday, September 16, 2014
My greatest fear, is it yours?
One of the worst feelings in the world is when you hear someone knock on your door and you wake up from a dead sleep and your child is not next to you (where they are supposed to be.) The first time this happened I felt like I was going to have a heart attack. The manager for the apartment was there telling me that my naked toddler was downstairs in the garage wandering around.
I'm not the only person this has happened to either. You hear every day that a child with autism has wandered off and either drowns, gets hit by a car or is never seen from again. It's a horrible thing to think about so as parents we don't, we scoot it to the back of our head or we fast forward through that story on the news. But as parents of special needs kids we NEED to think about it. We really really really need to think about it. It's heartbreaking to open that door dreading that the police are going to be not knowing where your child is. This is a fear for neuro-typical kids but what happens when your son or daughter doesn't have words to give the police their phone number, their address or even their full name.
We try to prepare our autistic and special need kids for the day when we are not there, we try to stick by them when we are at the grocery store or at a park, but what about when they go to school? Or when the Grandparents have finally convinced you that they are ready to take on the responsibility. Or when they go on their first field trip, or even just a walk-a-thon at school.
After that day with Liam in the apartment garage I started looking for identity bracelets. My first thought was, "Liam would never leave those on," and indeed he didn't. The first bracelet I bought for him went down the toilet. Literally went down the toilet. Liam got it off and flushed it. The second was hidden inside his guitar that we didn't find for over a year.
After that I started getting more creative. There are tons of different options out there. We are not the only parents that have gone through this. I want to share with you the ones I have found the most useful.
The first one I got from The Big Red Box of Saftey. This is an AWESOME resource for parents or caregivers of children of autism. It comes with
I'm not the only person this has happened to either. You hear every day that a child with autism has wandered off and either drowns, gets hit by a car or is never seen from again. It's a horrible thing to think about so as parents we don't, we scoot it to the back of our head or we fast forward through that story on the news. But as parents of special needs kids we NEED to think about it. We really really really need to think about it. It's heartbreaking to open that door dreading that the police are going to be not knowing where your child is. This is a fear for neuro-typical kids but what happens when your son or daughter doesn't have words to give the police their phone number, their address or even their full name.
We try to prepare our autistic and special need kids for the day when we are not there, we try to stick by them when we are at the grocery store or at a park, but what about when they go to school? Or when the Grandparents have finally convinced you that they are ready to take on the responsibility. Or when they go on their first field trip, or even just a walk-a-thon at school.
After that day with Liam in the apartment garage I started looking for identity bracelets. My first thought was, "Liam would never leave those on," and indeed he didn't. The first bracelet I bought for him went down the toilet. Literally went down the toilet. Liam got it off and flushed it. The second was hidden inside his guitar that we didn't find for over a year.
After that I started getting more creative. There are tons of different options out there. We are not the only parents that have gone through this. I want to share with you the ones I have found the most useful.
The first one I got from The Big Red Box of Saftey. This is an AWESOME resource for parents or caregivers of children of autism. It comes with
- a checklist
- a family wandering emergency plan
- a sample IEP letter to give to your school
- a first responders form with such stuff as weight, height, hair color even a place to put a current photo
- a wandering prevention form
- (2) door/window alarms with batteries
- (1) RoadID plate for a shoe (comes with free engraving)
- (5) Laminated "Stop" Signs that you can put on doors and windows
- (1) Red band bracelet (I have autism!)
- (2) Car clings that lets first responders know you have a child with autism (in case of a car accident)
*The RoadID plate for the shoe is great if your kid will leave it on (mine will not!)
Second is Americanmedical-id.com . We tend to see these at pharmacies, They have the pad where you pull one off. You know the kind our Grandma and Grandpa's wear to let the doctor know they have diabetes. After the shoe one didn't work I tried going here and getting a fun, brightly colored bracelet that looks more like a watch then an emergency bracelet. However that's the one my son flushed. Until one day I was talking to them as I was ordering a new one and they asked if I had tried the kind that lock. There's a kind that lock?! Where's that one? And we have been with this one ever since.
In their search box you want to search safety hook clasp, my son who can get out of almost anything has yet to get out of this one. You can bathe with it, you can swim with it, you can even sleep in it. After awhile they stop even noticing it.
If for some reason they can get out of them, my last advice is a fake tattoo with your phone number written on it.
Good luck and stay safe!
Monday, September 15, 2014
Hard Day, Easy Dinner
There are times when I get home and my children look at me like they have never eaten in their lives. I fear for body parts if I put them too close to their mouths. There are also times when I'm just to exhausted to cook or it's just too dang hot in my apartment that I can't stand the thought of turning on the stove.
There are also nights I cringe when Liam brings me a box of Kraft's Macaroni & Cheese Sponge Bob Shapes or a can of Campbell's Super Mario Brother's Condensed Shapes Soup (yes it does exist!) Or when Logan begs for McDonald's and I would rather eat sewage than eat Mickey Dee's!
All of those nights are Munchery nights.
Going out is fun but some nights you just want to stay in, put on the television and wear your favorite sweats with that holey tshirt your kid spilled mustard on and stained but the stain looks like a heart which your kid pointed out so now you can't throw out the mustard stained tshirt. Sorry, where was I? Oh yes, Munchery!
Munchery is a 5 star resteraunt on your couch with the mustard stained shirt.
Pros:
There are also nights I cringe when Liam brings me a box of Kraft's Macaroni & Cheese Sponge Bob Shapes or a can of Campbell's Super Mario Brother's Condensed Shapes Soup (yes it does exist!) Or when Logan begs for McDonald's and I would rather eat sewage than eat Mickey Dee's!
All of those nights are Munchery nights.
Going out is fun but some nights you just want to stay in, put on the television and wear your favorite sweats with that holey tshirt your kid spilled mustard on and stained but the stain looks like a heart which your kid pointed out so now you can't throw out the mustard stained tshirt. Sorry, where was I? Oh yes, Munchery!
Munchery is a 5 star resteraunt on your couch with the mustard stained shirt.
Pros:
- Requires little prep
- Can be delievered even when you aren't home
- Has three delievery times
- Has new food every day (except on the weekends)
- Has a program where you pay a flat fee and get free shipping for the year
- Has recyclable/compostable containers
- Food is fully cooked but you can reheat in microwave or oven
- Has childrens meal
- Has desserts, sides, and drinks
- You add the tip when you pay (when you order online) so you don't feel akward when you only give a 3 dollar tip
- Portions are huge, the childrens portions are enough to feed an adult
- Different choices each night (can be a pro or con)
- There's an app (isn't there an app for everything?)
- There are vegetarian, vegan, and gluten free options
- Entrees are reasonably prices 9$-13$ (for another couple of weeks everything is under 10)
- Always a well balanced meal (who always cooks veggies? Especially when kids are fighting you!)
Cons:
- They don't always have what you or your kids will eat that night
- There are no choices with sides (I would really like to see this, especially with the kids plates)
- If they mess up an order you have to cook
Click here to try Munchery and get $10 dollars off your first order.
Go Green Dragons!
Liam has been begging to do a sport forever and finally a friend of ours who also has a special needs son said that they had tried out soccer and her son had loved it. I was a bit weary of trying it out.
Liam had never played soccer before, Liam hasn't ever played any sport. The other kids might not understand when he sat down in the middle of the field and put his hands over his ears because the noise was too loud. They might not understand when he would try to take his shirt off because he was getting stressed out. What if he wasn't good and the coaches wouldn't let him play? There were tons of these thoughts going through my head the week before our first soccer game.
I couldn't have been more wrong. First of all we decided on Region 62, Area N, Section 2. Tracy is the wonderful lady who organizes the VIP program and Coach Ron and Coach Rhona are they coaches that run it. Depending on the day we have 6-12 kids playing. The kids are anywhere from 4 to 18. It starts at 10 and is 1 hour.
They start the practice off with 20 minutes of warm ups, each child has his or her own personal coach, a lot of the youth from older teams come to volunteer but there are adults as well.They take a water break at the 30 minute mark. After the water break they do a "mini game." These are sooo much fun and really boost the confidence of the kids. Every kid gets to play, every kid gets a chance to make a goal. The older kids usually play goalie.
This is an inexpensive way to get your special needs child out of the house on a Saturday. They get a ton of exercise, socialize with other kids, learn new skills, they get to learn to be part of a team and they get to have a wonderful time. The benefits aren't just for your kids though, they are for you as well. They let you participate in cheering your children on, meeting other parents and showing pride in your child's accomplishments.
AYSO VIP Program
Coach Tracy
Liam had never played soccer before, Liam hasn't ever played any sport. The other kids might not understand when he sat down in the middle of the field and put his hands over his ears because the noise was too loud. They might not understand when he would try to take his shirt off because he was getting stressed out. What if he wasn't good and the coaches wouldn't let him play? There were tons of these thoughts going through my head the week before our first soccer game.
I couldn't have been more wrong. First of all we decided on Region 62, Area N, Section 2. Tracy is the wonderful lady who organizes the VIP program and Coach Ron and Coach Rhona are they coaches that run it. Depending on the day we have 6-12 kids playing. The kids are anywhere from 4 to 18. It starts at 10 and is 1 hour.
They start the practice off with 20 minutes of warm ups, each child has his or her own personal coach, a lot of the youth from older teams come to volunteer but there are adults as well.They take a water break at the 30 minute mark. After the water break they do a "mini game." These are sooo much fun and really boost the confidence of the kids. Every kid gets to play, every kid gets a chance to make a goal. The older kids usually play goalie.
This is an inexpensive way to get your special needs child out of the house on a Saturday. They get a ton of exercise, socialize with other kids, learn new skills, they get to learn to be part of a team and they get to have a wonderful time. The benefits aren't just for your kids though, they are for you as well. They let you participate in cheering your children on, meeting other parents and showing pride in your child's accomplishments.
AYSO VIP Program
Coach Tracy
The Most Amazing Chewy EVER!!!
Both of my boys are very mouthy, meaning they stick everything and anything into their mouths.
I have tried TONS of products to help with this, some have been on a lanyard that snaps back when not in use which is a great idea but it just doesn't work for us. Liam swings them around until I'm afraid one of my kids is going to lose an eye. Or they are too hard and I feel like they are going to break a tooth.
Most of these chewy don't come with a necklace or something else to hang on. This doesn't work for us because my kids will put it down and forget about it. I have tried so many different types of
. Until recently I always thought my kids would just continue to chew on their clothes until finally I found one!!!!!!!!!!
. Until recently I always thought my kids would just continue to chew on their clothes until finally I found one!!!!!!!!!!
It's amazing. It's got a soft texture that doesn't break. So they really feel like they can chew on it. It's on a necklace but if the necklace is pulled too tight it will open so I don't have to worry about them choking. It's not as expensive as some of the other chewys. I have found. All in all I would totally recommend it.
Sunday, September 14, 2014
New Blog
I thought I was going to have an autistic free weekend, I sometimes feel that my life revolves around autism, but when I met two other Moms whose children were just starting off in the Special Education Department I realized that even though my life does revolve around autism I could put it to good use and share my experience with others.
Today is a new day, at least that's what I keep telling myself. It's actually 7:48 at night, so I guess there is nothing new about it. It was a busy weekend Liam played soccer with AYSO in Foster City and we had soooooo much fun. Logan went on his camping trip to Yosemite, he had fun but compalined about a headache the whole time. Logan tends to do that when there are too many people around or there is too much noise.
Today we went to the Ice Cream Social for the new Special Ed PTA. I wasn't impressed. First of all they didn't have any information that I didn't already have. Secondly there was another party going on next door and they had a jumpy house, which is great for their kids but our kids were quite upset they didn't get to go on the jumpy house. The best part of the event was seeing old friends and meeting some new faces. r
They also had some teens doing face painting, Liam doesn't like face painting so instead we got our hands done. They did an awesome job putting a Mario symbol on his hand. He still has it and won't let me wash it off.
I met some other Moms there, thier boys were in kindergarten and they had Liam's old teacher. We got to talking and I tried to give them as much info that I had wished I had when I first started the special ed department. Information that our school district would not tell us, like which kind of therapies you can ask the school to pay for or what items our most important to send your child with.
People have been telling me for awhile to make this blog. I have a 12 year old when most of the other parents are starting for the first time. I would tell my husband, Andrew what they said but I would always laugh it off. Me? I don't have enough info to run a blog. I don't even know how to run a blog. But the more I talked to the other Moms the more I realized how much I did know and how much I take for granted that I know.
So that is what this blog will be about, it will be about all the knowledge that I have accumulated over the years and all the knowledge that I plan to gather in the future. Hopefully the information that I take for granted can be of some use for you and your children. If there is something specific you want to know please ask, as my friends and family can tell you I'm quite the talker! The most important piece of advice I have for you is this: You are your child's greatest advocate, if you won't fight for them, who will?
Today is a new day, at least that's what I keep telling myself. It's actually 7:48 at night, so I guess there is nothing new about it. It was a busy weekend Liam played soccer with AYSO in Foster City and we had soooooo much fun. Logan went on his camping trip to Yosemite, he had fun but compalined about a headache the whole time. Logan tends to do that when there are too many people around or there is too much noise.
Today we went to the Ice Cream Social for the new Special Ed PTA. I wasn't impressed. First of all they didn't have any information that I didn't already have. Secondly there was another party going on next door and they had a jumpy house, which is great for their kids but our kids were quite upset they didn't get to go on the jumpy house. The best part of the event was seeing old friends and meeting some new faces. r
They also had some teens doing face painting, Liam doesn't like face painting so instead we got our hands done. They did an awesome job putting a Mario symbol on his hand. He still has it and won't let me wash it off.
I met some other Moms there, thier boys were in kindergarten and they had Liam's old teacher. We got to talking and I tried to give them as much info that I had wished I had when I first started the special ed department. Information that our school district would not tell us, like which kind of therapies you can ask the school to pay for or what items our most important to send your child with.
People have been telling me for awhile to make this blog. I have a 12 year old when most of the other parents are starting for the first time. I would tell my husband, Andrew what they said but I would always laugh it off. Me? I don't have enough info to run a blog. I don't even know how to run a blog. But the more I talked to the other Moms the more I realized how much I did know and how much I take for granted that I know.
So that is what this blog will be about, it will be about all the knowledge that I have accumulated over the years and all the knowledge that I plan to gather in the future. Hopefully the information that I take for granted can be of some use for you and your children. If there is something specific you want to know please ask, as my friends and family can tell you I'm quite the talker! The most important piece of advice I have for you is this: You are your child's greatest advocate, if you won't fight for them, who will?
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